Why I Almost Didn’t Write the Sequel
What I lost, what I grieved, and what called me back
🖤 START WITH THE STRUGGLE
I was 30% into the first draft of Chaos of the Stars when my hard drive failed.
No warning. No backup. No neatly saved version in the cloud.
Just… gone.
30,000+ words.
Weeks of worldbuilding.
Pages I’d stayed up late to write.
Entire scenes I would never remember well enough to recreate.
I stared at the blank screen for what felt like hours—numb.
Devastated.
And then quietly, deeply sure of one thing:
I couldn’t do this again.
🌿 SHIFT THE NARRATIVE
I wish I could say I rallied the next day.
That I sat down with a fresh page and rewrote with passion and fire.
But I didn’t.
I grieved.
Hard.
Not just the words I’d lost, but the version of me who had believed she could write this book.
I told myself maybe I wasn’t meant to write this sequel.
Maybe the lost pages were a sign.
Maybe Soul of the Stars was all I had in me.
But here’s what I’ve learned in the aftermath of that loss:
Sometimes what feels like a dead end is actually a refining fire.
Sometimes the story has to break before it becomes what it was meant to be.
🔥 SHARE YOUR EXPERIENCE
It took me months to return.
Not just to the story—but to my why.
And when I finally started writing again, something had shifted.
The words were slower, yes.
But they were also deeper.
Richer.
And more raw and more honest than the first version had ever dared to be.
Because I wasn’t just rewriting a book.
I was rebuilding trust with myself.
With the story.
With God who called me to write it in the first place.
I had to stop measuring progress in word count and start measuring it in faith.
✍️ SOW A STRATEGY
If you’ve ever lost something precious—pages, momentum, belief in yourself—here’s what I want you to know:
The words may be gone, but the story is still in you.
📖 Try this:
Write a letter to the version of you who lost the draft.
Name what hurts.
Name what’s still sacred.
And then ask, “What do I know now that I didn’t know then?”
Sometimes the ashes hold more wisdom than the original pages ever did.
💬 SEED THE NEXT STEP
Chaos of the Stars almost didn’t exist.
Not because I stopped believing in the story, but because I was heartbroken by what I’d lost.
And yet somehow… this version?
It feels more… right and aligned with the story God has placed in my heart.
Next week, I’ll be sharing how I wrote a fantasy book rooted in faith, grief, and grit—because those three threads were braided into every chapter of this rewrite.
💌 Want to come behind the scenes and walk this next chapter with me?
Join the Pen to Purpose Papers list for launch updates, preorder bonuses, and exclusive content from the world of Chaos of the Stars.
And if you’ve ever thought, “I can’t start over,”
let me be your reminder:
You don’t need to re-create the exact same story.
You just need to return to the truth that called you to write in the first place.
The story is still in you.
And this time… it might burn brighter than ever.
